One person walks down the aisle. The other is already waiting. The celebrant is standing at the front, the wedding party knows where to go, and everyone seems to know what happens next.

At least, that’s how it can look when you watch someone else’s wedding.

When it’s your turn, you might suddenly realise that nobody has actually told you who walks first, where you’re supposed to stand, which side your partner should be on, or what happens to everyone once they reach the front.

The good news is that there isn’t one correct way to do any of this. The traditional arrangement is simply one option, and your ceremony can be much simpler, more relaxed or completely different if that’s what feels right for you.

There is no legal rule about who has to walk down the aisle first. This is one of those wedding traditions that can feel like a rule simply because we’ve seen it so many times.

In a traditional ceremony, one person enters while the other waits at the front. Often the wedding party enters first, followed by the person getting married, but there are plenty of variations.

You can walk in separately. You can walk in together. You can have one person already waiting while the other makes an entrance. You can even have no formal processional at all.

The best choice is usually the one that feels comfortable rather than the one you think you’re supposed to make.

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Traditionally, the couple stands at the front facing the celebrant, with the wedding party arranged nearby and guests seated behind them.

You may also have heard that one person should stand on a particular side and the other on the opposite side. These traditions vary, and they aren’t legal requirements.

What matters much more is whether the arrangement works for the people in the ceremony and the space you’re getting married in.

Do we have to stand on a certain side?

No. There is no legal requirement for one partner to stand on the left and the other on the right. If you have a preference, use it. If you don’t, your celebrant can help you work out an arrangement that looks and feels natural in the space.

Does the celebrant stand between the couple?

Not necessarily. Your celebrant might stand directly in front of you, slightly to one side, or in another position that works better for the space. The important practical consideration is that your celebrant can conduct the ceremony properly and that you and your guests can see and hear what is happening.

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There is no single perfect position for a couple to stand during their ceremony. The traditional setup is a useful starting point, but the ceremony space often gives you a better answer.

You want to be able to see each other, hear each other and interact naturally. Your celebrant needs to be able to see and hear you, and your guests should be able to follow what is happening without having to crane their necks or move around.

The shape of the space can make a difference too. A narrow garden, a beach ceremony, a living room at home and a large wedding venue may all call for slightly different arrangements.

If you’re still deciding where to hold your ceremony, you can also explore Eliza’s ceremony locations for ideas about beaches, waterfront settings, gardens, homes and other meaningful places.

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If you have bridesmaids, groomsmen or another group of people standing with you, they will usually stand to either side of the couple.

But again, there is no prescribed arrangement. A large wedding party might spread out along the front of the ceremony, while a smaller group might stand close to the couple.

You also don’t need to have everyone standing for the entire ceremony. Depending on the people involved and the space, some members of the wedding party may sit down after the entrance.

If you have a larger group, it is worth thinking about how everyone will move into position before the ceremony. A simple plan can make the entrance feel much calmer.

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Traditionally, parents and immediate family sit in the first few rows, where they have a clear view of the ceremony.

There is no requirement for parents to sit on a particular side, however, and there is no need to force a traditional arrangement if it doesn’t suit your family.

This can be particularly helpful when family structures are more complicated. You might want parents, step-parents, grandparents or other important people seated together rather than dividing them according to tradition.

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Children can be part of the ceremony in all sorts of ways. They might walk down the aisle before you, walk with you, stand beside you, sit with family or simply come up for a particular part of the ceremony.

There is no need to give them a complicated role just because you have seen it done elsewhere.

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The same principle applies: there is no required bride-and-groom arrangement, and there is no legal rule about which partner enters first or where either person stands.

You might both walk down the aisle separately, walk in together, have one partner waiting for the other, or choose something entirely different.

Your ceremony should reflect the two people getting married, rather than trying to fit you into a traditional arrangement that wasn’t designed with you in mind.

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You don’t have to have one.

Some couples love the tradition of one person waiting while the other walks towards them. Others find the idea uncomfortable or simply don’t see themselves in it.

Some alternatives include:

• Walking into the ceremony together.
• Having one person waiting while the other enters.
• Entering from different directions.
• Walking with a parent, child, sibling or another important person.
• Having the wedding party enter together.
• Starting the ceremony with everyone already in place.
• Creating an entrance that has meaning for you rather than following a familiar tradition.

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They can, but they don’t have to.

Your celebrant may already be in position when guests arrive. They may enter as part of the processional, or they may come into place shortly before the ceremony begins.

There isn’t a legal requirement for a celebrant to enter in a particular way. It is simply part of planning how you want the ceremony to flow.

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Once you stop worrying about finding the one correct arrangement, the decision becomes much easier.

I would usually think about six things:

• Can you see each other comfortably?
• Can your celebrant see and hear you clearly?
• Can your guests see and hear the ceremony?
• Does everyone know where they are going and what happens next?
• Does the arrangement work with the shape and conditions of the space?
• Most importantly, does it feel comfortable and like you?

This is one reason a ceremony rehearsal can be useful. You don’t necessarily need to rehearse every word, but walking through the entrance and working out where everyone goes can remove a lot of uncertainty.

If you’re thinking about the ceremony as a whole, rather than just the entrance, you may also find Eliza’s guide to writing a wedding ceremony script useful. That article focuses on what happens and what is said during the ceremony, while this one is about the physical flow of people through the space.

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Who walks down the aisle first at a wedding?

There is no legal requirement for a particular person to walk first. Traditionally, the wedding party may enter before the person getting married, while their partner waits at the front, but you can choose a different arrangement.

Which side should the bride and groom stand on?

There is no legally required side. Traditional arrangements exist, but couples can stand wherever works best for them, their celebrant and their ceremony space.

Does the celebrant walk down the aisle?

They can, but they don’t have to. The celebrant’s entrance is part of the ceremony flow rather than a legal requirement.

Can we walk down the aisle together?

Absolutely. Walking in together is a lovely option for couples who don’t want one person to be waiting at the front.

Can one person already be waiting at the front?

Yes. This is one of the simplest ceremony arrangements, and it can work particularly well when one person doesn’t want a formal entrance.

Do we need to have a bridal party?

No. You can have a wedding party of any size, including none at all. You can also involve friends and family without having them formally stand beside you.

Do we have to stand in a particular place for the legal ceremony?

No. Australian marriage law does not prescribe a particular standing position or aisle arrangement. The legal requirements concern things such as the authorised celebrant, required wording, documentation, and the presence of the couple and two witnesses over 18.

Do we need to have an aisle?

No. An aisle is simply one way of creating an entrance. At a home, garden, beach or other informal ceremony, you might arrange the space without a traditional aisle at all.